Sunday, February 10, 2013

The Bachelor: Double Dippin' - Part II

Ok, this special 2-night special continues now! I hope I don't crash in the middle of this. Putting in double duty, I need to get rewarded or something for the double duty. Anyway, let's start the show...

9:00 PM: Sucks this started at 9... and it's STILL 2 hours long. ABC, y'all are killin' me.

Previews for this episode do look entertaining though!

Oh snap, we're in Canada now! Another scenic place. I tell ya, there are some beautiful places on this earth. Seeing this scenery really makes me want to travel.

9:02 PM: The ladies have arrived and of course, Chris Harrison is there to greet them with his usual rundown of the week.

Oh snap, this Chateau they're at has an AWESOME view. I might have to visit this place!

9:04 PM: Oh snap, the date card has now entered the room. Woohoo, Catherine (my favorite) gets the first one-on-one date.

Uhh... they just cut to some terrible... ice storm looking area. Catherine looks kinda dumb just standing out there by herself, haha.

That's a whole lotta nothin'.

Oh... and this uh... HUGE snow bus comes rollin' up. Sean is taking advantage of his transportation opportunities. I'm wondering if he made special requests to drive everything.

9:07 PM: They arrive at Jasper National Park which, at the moment, looks like the worst national park in the world. Not only is it in the mountains, but there's nothing there. Like... nothing. No trails, (and if there are trails, they're currently covered by snow), no camping area, no benches or picnic tables - nothin'!

Yeeahhh, look at all the fun stuff to do!

He... looks like an idiot.

But hey, they're having fun sledding and playing in the snow.

This looks so stupid. It's windy, snow is flying everywhere, oh... and it's cold as crap... and they decide to sit and eat OUTSIDE. C'mon, now...


9:11 PM: We're back and it's now the second half of the one-on-one date.

They're going on a carriage ride. Has Disney made that like... every girl's fantasy? - Horse-drawn carriage ride. Chocolate and horses - haven't met a girl who doesn't like one of those yet.

Oh snap, they went in a big ice castle aka an igloo.

This looks like a castle Bowser from Mario would live in.

9:14 PM: Back at the hotel, date card #2 has arrived and... poor Daniella still doesn't get the one-on-one date. Stuck on the group date which seems to be like the "friend zone" haha.

Ok, back to the date and Catherine is sharing a traumatic experience from when she was younger.


Wow. That WAS a traumatic experience. Basically, she said she saw a tree literally fall on a girl that was right in front of her and kill her. That's like... cartoon/movie stuff. Could you imagine actually witnessing that?

9:16 PM: Catherine gets the rose. That didn't take long. Sean says he's "crazy about [Catherine]" and Asha points out that he seems to be "crazy" about everyone there. But... minus Tierra, I can't blame him.

Got some more previews for what's coming up in this episode. I can't wait for this dramatic scene with Tierra. Every time they show her trembling, I HAVE to also imitate and tremble along with her.

Exact replica. 


So I had my first day of CrossFit today. My quads are getting nice and sore. We did a lot of squats... I'm gonna have buns of STEEL soon.

9:21 PM: Alright, it's group date time! Let's see what crazy antics Sean puts them through this time!

Uh oh, another canoe ride. Lesley, being the smart girl that she is, immediately notices the number of canoes vs. number of people and claims "shotgun" with Sean. Power move.

"Have you ever canoed?" asked Jeremy
"Duh, I was a girl scout," replied Asha... with the most serious facial expression ever. (Sorry I asked.)

9:25 PM: Ok, this stupid canoe stuff is done. Now Sean wants to "embrace" Canada a little more with this polar plunge.

Two things:
1. Why do (white) people find jumping into super cold water fun? The EMT is currently   going over a laundry list of the dangers.
2. Is it a requirement to be able to swim? Do they assume everyone can swim or is that part of the waiver form?

Well, Selma isn't my favorite of the ladies left, but she just got a couple cool points with me for NOT jumping into this water. You can call me a princess too, I really don't care. I wouldn't do it either. I witnessed 4 "polar plunge" events while at Appalachian State University and guess how many I participated in... that's right... zero.

1 is the loneliest number.


9:30 PM: Ok, we're back. Ashlee is contemplating if she should do this or not.

Haha, Selma said she's from Bagdad... and apparently the people of Bagdad are like black people - they don't do these cold weather activities either.

9:33 PM: The girls are trying to prep themselves/stay warm.

Oh lord... Ashlee is all wishy-washy, but decides to do it anyway making her "emotionally vulnerable." Yeah whatever.

These fools went and actually did it. I don't get it but... whatever.




They're all acting like this is the best thing ever. I... really don't get it. I mean, it's not like this is THAT difficult of a task. It's just not smart.

9:36 PM: And so it begins... Tierra is breaking down. She can't stand up... acting unresponsive... exactly how you would expect her to act at this moment.

She jumped in just like everyone else, but I guess Tierra jumped in an even colder part.


And she has to be carried off.

Haha, Sean is FREEZING.

Ok, they're carrying Tierra away. ABC... you continue to restore my faith in video editing because that entire sequence wasn't nearly as dramatic as it seemed in the previews.


9:42 PM: Ok, we're back and Catherine and Desiree now see someone is all covered up and being attended to by the EMT crew. Honestly, they should be able to guess who that is.

Anyway, this entire episode with Tierra reminds me of the "Tyson Zone" I talked about in the previous post.

I have no words.

9:44 PM: Hahaha, Catherine talks about wondering how the other girls are doing... and cut to them celebrating and being happy as they return. That was funny.

I think Lindsay has now also entered Tierra into the Tyson Zone. Except, the opposite... she DOESN'T believe anything Tierra does. All of the girls remaining are over her antics now. This is like deja vu with Kourtney on Ben's season.


Dodge's commercial about getting your car funded is genius. I wish that was around/I thought of that when I was younger. I probably would've worked harder for that than scholarships.

9:51 PM: OK, part 2 of the group date without Tierra. I know the ladies are liking this.

I like how the girls prep for their one-on-one time. Seems very strategic.

"I love, love" - one of my favorite cheesy lines. (Lesley said this by the way)

9:53 PM: Ok, alone time with Sarah and she's sharing pictures of her childhood with Sean. Has she had these the entire time? Also, does it surprise anyone that she's still around? I definitely didn't view her as that strong of a participant but... she's stickin' around.

9:56 PM: How much does it mean that Desiree is getting a second one-on-one date... before Daniella even got one?

Oh lord... Tierra decides to go crash the group date. This should be fun.

Hahahahaha... the girls are all sitting around making fun of Tierra. Haha... Lindsay was the class clown. That was funny.

Hahahahahahahahahahaha... and in the middle of them talking about her, of course that's when Tierra shows up. The other girls are finally realizing Tierra's (aka the "Tierra-ist", coined by Lesley) evil genius. This girl is literally an evil mastermind.

These are the stunned faces of women who thought they wouldn't see anymore of Tierra that night.

10:00 PM: Man... it's 10:00 PM... this show is supposed to be going OFF now... nope, still got another hour.

Anyway, Lesley gets the rose. Tierra is not pleased. Of course Tierra thinks she deserves the rose...


10:04 PM: Ok, we're back on and Sean is thinking over his next decision - sending someone home because he's not feeling it.

Poor Sarah... she does NOT see this coming. I guess in hindsight, showing the pictures wasn't a good idea? Seems like it's maybe freaked Sean out a lil' bit. But yeah, I feel bad for Sarah. She's holding back the tears... ugh, I feel bad for her.

I wouldn't want to go back into the room and say goodbye to everyone right now... and he's making her go back in there and do it. Kinda funny that I mentioned her still being around and... well now she's going home.

Do you think she'll be the next Bachelorette? Eh... I don't know, they usually go with whatever girl comes in second place.

Ooohhhhh snap, got a preview and looks like Selma is gonna break all the rules and kiss Sean on national TV!!! Now her mom is going to think she's a whore. And, let's go ahead and put this out here - if she wants to stay/win, she's got to kiss the guy. You can't be a tease the entire season and expect to win.


Man, this second episode of the Bachelor is causing me to miss 'New Girl' and 'the Mindy Project'. Jerks.

10:15 PM: Ok, we're back and Desiree is prepping for her date with Sean.

Oh look, another date where they have to climb up/down some mountain... this is getting old, Sean.

They've started their decent. This... isn't even fun to watch.

10:20 PM: They finally reached the picnic area. Desiree is clearly eating the food because... she's talking with her mouth full. Jeeze, learn some manners.

That segment was kind of boring.


10:27 PM: Yo, they're like... deep in the woods for the rest of this date. Like... a legit teepee. Chief Sitting Bull is impressed.

What is Sean wearing right now? It looks like a... Native American Bill Cosby sweater.

Peep my sweet sweater, Des. Yeah, I know you like it.
Dang, Desiree and her family lived in a tent at one time. All jokes aside, I really hope during that time period, it was summer.

Desiree seems very genuine on this date. And, she got that rose. #Winning


10:37 PM: We're back and it's rose ceremony time.

I have to say, the ladies are lookin' good for this ceremony. Anyway, the girls are seriously tired of Tierra being there. I have to say, I think Tierra is in the "bottom 2 or 3" right now. Not sure who's going home.

Ok, so Selma gets some one-on-one time. And oh snap... it looks like Selma is going to do it - and by "it" i mean... kiss Sean!

Now, this WAS a big move for her, so... I won't joke about it... haha.

10:41 PM: Alone time with Lindsay and she has promised not to kiss Sean at all during this time. She's very... goofy. She seems fun to be around but, it doesn't seem like there's really much there with her. Just, not very... deep.

Ok, one-on-one time with Ashlee. She's talking about relinquishing control sooo... she gives him a scarf to blindfold her so she can trust him. This is dumb. I get it, you have some control/trust issues but... this just seems kind of dumb. Nothing to cry over. He CARRIED you most of the way. I don't understand ladies sometimes (join the club, Jeremy).

Chris Harrison has come to break up this party. Time to decide who's going home. I really don't know who's leaving. We didn't see any one-on-one time with Tierra or Daniella. Has it come down to those 2? Would he let Daniella go without even 1 one-on-one date? This decision is big.


10:50 PM: We're back on and it's time to wrap this episode up!

As the numbers are dwindling, the ladies are feeling the pressure.

OH SNAP! Only 3 roses to give out tonight meaning TWO ladies are going home. Intensity level just skyrocketed!

Blah, blah, blah... Sean's talking... hurry up, man! People are ready to go to bed!

10:52 PM: First rose goes to... (ahh the suspense!!)... Lindsay! Not surprised, he likes kissing her.

Ok, Rose number 2 - Ashlee. Again, not surprised.

Ok, NOW here comes to the good stuff!! The final rose... who's it gonna be...

The final rose goes to...


HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ahh, is this really a surprise though? Aww, these 2 ladies feel SO stupid right now. Selma took her big step and kissed the man on TV like she wasn't supposed to do and got sent home. AND Daniella didn't even get a one-on-one date.

I wish one of them would make a scene as they left. Just knock over some stuff... kick something. Give me a show!

Ya know, there are tons of people out there that don't believe in love and marriage and this show is NOT helping. In reality, love (and marriage) isn't a game or competition.

Anyway, we FINALLY get to go to a tropical destination. And once again, we get some Tierra drama. Previews look pretty good, but they get us every time with the previews.

11:00 PM: Ok, the marathon is finally over. 2 nights, back to back... that was quite a journey. As promised though, we've got NEW POWER RANKINGS!

Only 6 girls remaining which calls for some straight up, top to bottom rankings!

1. The number 1 spot goes to Desiree. I think she's the only girl that Sean has just straight up told they don't have to worry about anything. That should make her feel pretty confident she's not going anywhere for a while.

2. Tierra. I know many won't agree with this, but man, she's got Sean wrapped around her finger. He knows there's some drama with her, but seems to refuse to believe the amount of drama that's actually there. Tierra is the equivalent of a team that continues to just barely win. Never blowing out or dominating anyone, but always pulling out the win. This evil woman continues to pull something out to focus everything on her and keep herself on Sean's mind... which gets her a rose every week.

3. Ok, I have a tie here - Catherine and Lesley. I feel like they're both just... equal right now. Sean hasn't said anything bad or negative while with them. He always has fun with them, and neither of them have wavered on how they feel or where they stand with him. The only reason they're both at the 3 spot is because neither of them are at the forefront. I think they're my 2 favorites though.

4. Lindsay. Sean clearly likes her - but I think that's where it stops. All they do is kiss and they never have real conversation. That's always fun for a while but, it gets old. At some point Sean HAS to want more than that. But, I know for a fact that seriously getting to that point, for us guys, can be... difficult.

5. Ashlee rounds out the rankings. She's in the last spot which doesn't necessarily mean she's "in the bottom" or anything. I just think she's the most serious of the ladies left. I think she's the oldest and just seems to be very... serious all the time. I know it's all edited for our entertaining pleasure, but it's like she never really has any fun. I can only go off of what I see.

OK, there you go. The latest POWER RANKINGS. It was tough with these rankings because they're all pretty even at this point. Anyway, let me know if you agree or disagree! I like to hear your opinions. Hope you all enjoyed, see ya next week!

No comments:

Post a Comment